Why You Don’t Need A Third Party To Ensure Discipline
It is very common for parents to blow the actions of their children out of proportion. Even worse is when they hand them over to a third party for discipline.
The rationale is that some matters are best handled by an authority figure like a pastor, teacher or relative. The goal of such exposure is to ensure that they are shamed into contrition and never repeat such actions again.
Unknown to many, bringing in a third party in parenting can expose a child to a lot of danger. Your child should never have to suffer in the name of curbing youthful exuberance.
We explore reasons why you should be wary of bringing in a third party.
It exposes them to abuse Puberty brings rapid changes in the body and an accompanying curiosity about the opposite sex.
Children in their teenage years experiencing puberty may experiment while exploring their sexuality.
This should serve as moment for you as a parent to talk about sex and its effect. it should never lead to namecalling and shipping off to a third party.
Many girls today have had their lives altered after their parents got wind of relationships with boys.They were sent to pastors and uncles for counselling and instead got abused.
This abuse often goes unreported and can mark a continuous struggle with self worth and sexuality.
If you find your daughther in such a situation, remember that she is not a loose girl or prostitute but a young teenager coming into terms with her sexuality.
Sit down and have a honest discussion about sex, boys and womanhood.
It batters self esteem Calling relatives and other people to report your child removes them from your protection and opens them up to taunting and cruel jokes.
Most times, the third party you invite doesn’t know any better but that does not stop the terrible negative effects.
A child accused of stealing, fighting or lying should be given a chance to explain and come clean. If you find the child liable, discipline should be enforced in your home by you without bringing in anyone.
A third party involved in the matter would constantly bring up the matter and batter your child’s self esteem consistently.
It breeds resentment Awkward relationships between parents and a child are often the product of ill thought interventions.
The events may be forgotten but the humiliation is evergreen and leads to resentment. Your child will perceive your actions as bad or lazy parenting.
If you have brought in a third party to discipline your child and opened a gateway for shame and humiliation,its not too late.
Have a honest discussion and apologise for your actions. It wont be easy but with openess on both sides, you can begin the journey to mutual respect and reconciliation
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