Cross River State-born gay rights activist Pamela Adie shared the lessons she leant after coming out of the closet...
"After I came out of the closet, I learned many lessons about life. I’ll share two," She writes
The first thing I learned is that I’m on my own.
It took me a while to realize this because I kept expecting
and waiting on family and friends to show support, give approval, and
accept me.
Very few did.
The others remained silent. And they’re still silent till today because neither has bothered to break the silence.
The second lesson is that nobody owes me anything.
There’s a tendency to feel entitled to peoples love,
acceptance, and financial resources based on their supposed role in our
lives...mother, father, brother, sister, uncle, aunt, cousin, niece,
bestie, friend, etc.
Nothing could be more false.
You’re not entitled to anything.
You want something, work hard for it.
Bear the consequences.
The sooner I started to feel less entitled, the happier I
became. I engaged with those that wanted to engage, laughed with those
that wanted to laugh. If I was in need, I asked. If I got, I appreciated.
If I didn’t, no hard feelings. Life continued. That’s how I live my life even now and I’m getting better at it.
So, instead of feeling like people owe you anything, work
hard on your own and be grateful for life helpers you meet along the
way.
Good morning.
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